There are many motivations people give for taking on the role of caregiver for a family member, including sense of duty. Often people have a mix of reasons for helping a relative and a mix of feelings about doing it.
Although books and articles about caregiving frequently use the expression “loved one” to refer to the person being cared for, the reality is that some people take on the caregiving role while in very strained and complex relationships with their families. Often, family caregivers rise to the challenge, despite feelings of anger and resentment or emotional distance, to perform the needed duties and treat relatives with respect.
The sense of duty, sometimes referred to as “filial responsibility” or “filial piety,” is a moral force that has been part of family life in most cultures of the world for centuries. Duty can be a strong incentive to follow one’s instincts and “do the right thing” by filling the void of needed care where family is concerned.
Interestingly, there are many reports of people finding that the time spent together, the changed and humbling circumstances of dealing with chronic or disabling illnesses, and the intimacy of caregiving can sometimes lead to improvements in relationships. Others, despite the strains, report a sense of satisfaction from following through on the sense of duty that is associated with family ties.
One resource you might want to look at that acknowledges both sides of the caregiving experience is “The Burdens and Blessings of Family Caregiving” at www.ces.ncsu.edu/depts/fcs/pdfs/fcs464.pdf.
For more information, visit http://www.extension.org/pages/Rewards_of_Caregiving.
