Spanking Does Not Teach Children What to Do

Parenting September 14, 2009 Print Friendly and PDF

Parenting Tips for Your 41-42 Month Old Child

Most parents do not want to spank their children. They often feel bad when they do. Sometimes, however, parents use physical punishment to express their own anger and frustrations with their children’s behavior.

A spanking may stop your child for the moment, but it will not stop her from doing the same thing later on. Spanking does not teach what to do instead. Spanking makes children feel overwhelmed, hurt, angry and humiliated. Often they do not even know why they got a spanking.

Physical punishment can lead to aggressive behavior later on. Most parents do not want their children to learn the lessons of hitting. They do not want their teenage daughter to think that it is okay for her boyfriend to hit her or their teenage son to slap the neighbor’s little boy. Hitting tells children that people who love you may hit you, and it is OK to hit people smaller than you are.

Most parents who spank their children do not go to the extreme of physically abusing them. Research, however, shows most physical abuse of children begins as ordinary physical punishment. Parents lose control and children are badly hurt. Positive discipline like teaching children the right thing to do, works. Punishment does not work.

Learn more about Your Child: 41-42 Months from Just In Time Parenting. You can also go to our Resource Links for additional information on child care and development.

Note to Parents: When reading this newsletter, remember: Every baby is different. Children may do things earlier or later than described here. This newsletter gives equal space and time to both sexes. If he or she is used, we are talking about all babies.
References: These materials were adapted by authors from Extension Just in Time Parenting Newsletters in California, Delaware, Georgia, Iowa, Kentucky, Maine, Tennessee, Nevada, New Hampshire, New Mexico, and Wisconsin.


eXtension is an interactive learning environment delivering research-based information emerging from America's land-grant university system.


Donate to Parenting

Your donation keeps eXtension growing.

Give Now