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Toddlers Use Imaginary Friends to Practice Social and Thinking Skills

Last Updated: September 14, 2009

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Parenting Tips for Your 33-34 Month Old Toddler

Fantasy or pretend play is getting more common at this age. Sometimes toddlers will even make-up imaginary friends or playmates. This is a normal for toddlers. As many as 2/3 of all toddlers make up a friend at some point before they enter school. It shows that their brains are developing. They have the ability to think of things that aren’t real.

For some toddlers, imaginary friends may come around only once in a while. For other toddlers, imaginary friends may be around all the time and last for a couple of years. Your toddler may deny to you that his friend is not real. Don’t worry; toddlers understand the difference between real and imaginary.

Having a chance to practice their language, thinking and social skills with a pretend friend can be good for their development. In fact, research shows that toddlers who have imaginary friends tend to be better at interacting with real friends. They also tend to have better language skills and creativity.

If your toddler has an imaginary friend:

  • Be patient. Let him play with his friend.
  • Do not make negative comments. These can make your toddler feel bad about himself.
  • Include the friend when your toddler invites him.
  • Play along. Your toddler will feel comfort knowing that you accept this part of his imaginary world.
  • Let your toddler be in control of the fantasy. Don’t talk or “play” with the friend unless your toddler invites you.
  • Don’t use the imaginary friend to bribe or comfort your toddler.


Learn more about Your Toddler: 33-34 Months from Just In Time Parenting. You can also go to our Resource Links for additional information on child care and development.


Note to Parents: When reading this newsletter, remember: Every baby is different. Children may do things earlier or later than described here. This newsletter gives equal space and time to both sexes. If he or she is used, we are talking about all babies.
References: These materials were adapted by authors from Extension Just in Time Parenting Newsletters in California, Delaware, Georgia, Iowa, Kentucky, Maine, Tennessee, Nevada, New Hampshire, New Mexico, and Wisconsin.

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