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My cousin and I are taking care of our mothers. My mother lives with me and my brother helps out. Living together makes it easier for me to know whether my mother is doing OK. I worry about my aunt. She lives by herself in a small apartment not too far from my cousin’s house. The two of them are like oil and water. They have never gotten along, but my cousin is the only one who lives nearby. My aunt needs help now on a daily basis, and my cousin is thinking about putting her in a nursing home. What could be stopping my cousin from letting her mother live with her?
Last Updated: January 22, 2008
Caregiving grows out of an earlier relationship among two people. The quality of this relationship can influence one’s willingness to assume a caregiving role and new obligations. Your cousin and aunt’s relationship is very different than your relationship with your mother. Your cousin might view her role differently and feel unprepared or isn't willing to do the kinds of things you do. She may also think of a nursing home as the only option available. She might not know there are community services that can help people continue living in their own home.
One thing you could do is help your cousin get information about home care services available in your aunt’s town. The area agency on aging can also help direct your cousin to specific support services she may need. Consult the ElderCare Locator ( http://www.eldercare.gov) to find an area agency on aging in your community.
For more information, visit: http://www.extension.org/pages/Caregiving_Is_Different_for_Everyone.
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