As Alzheimers disease becomes more severe individuals often become more agitated and combatative. Here are some strategies you might try. When she is calm, talk to her about changing into a different blouse or dress. Avoid giving her too many choices. Ask if she would like to wear her blue blouse or her green blouse. Use a calm soothing voice. You could also comment how beautiful she looks in the blouse. Empathize with her when she is agitated. Tell her it must be hard that she can no longer do the things she used to do.
I would also suggest that you have a someone meet with your family to discuss the difficulties your parents are experiencing. Your family health provider or a social worker who specializes in aging issues would be appropriate. Your father needs to reduce his stress. Stress is linked to numerous physical health problems. Explain to him that if he does not take care of himself, he won't be able to take care of his wife. Encourage them to use home health care or they may want to consider moving into a senior living facility that takes individuals with Alzheimers and other dementias. Often there are apartments where couples can live together and then there are activities appropriate for each person.
Finally, I would suggest that your Mother see her health care provider. Perhaps there are some medical interventions that could reduce her aggitation. Let her health care provider know when she has specific episodes of aggitation and any other behavioral problems that you see.
