I believe that all people, no matter what their culture, race, gender, religion, wish to be honored. Prejudice of any sort dishonors people. Diversity work, at its heart, has to do with the desire and the practicalities of how people honor each other (or don’t!) How do you work with difference and make diversity work? Living a life filled with honoring is fundamental.

Most people think of honoring as a concept—an idea they learned in childhood. In most cultures, children are taught to honor parents and elders. What does it look like to honor as an adult? This question is worth exploring. How to honor each person and situation from moment to moment is, for me personally, a full and rich lifelong inquiry. I recommend it.

For diversity professionals, the language and practices of honoring can be extraordinarily useful. I find that, when the word “honoring” is used, people pause and reflect before they speak. This word seems to introduce a sense of reverence into ordinary speech.

Here are a few simple practices to experiment with:

1) As an Extension professional, if you have a major decision to make, use these four overarching principles of honoring. Looking in these four categories is a powerful way to locate what is working or not working for you.

• Honoring Yourself
• Honoring Others
• Honoring the Planet
• Honoring the Mystery of the Universe

2) Use the word “honoring” as an intention for a meeting, a group, or a workshop focused on diversity. “Our intention today is to find the ways in which we do or don’t honor each other.”

3) Use the word “honoring” in daily speech. This word fits easily into the kinds of thoughts we express all the time. Incorporate it in phrases like the examples below and in phrases that you and others create:

• “I honor what you are saying.”
• “Did you feel honored in that situation?”
• “What would you like to be honored for?”
• “What do we honor in this group or organization?”

Create your own questions about honoring as a way for people to explore, consider and share the ways in which they are both similar and diverse. See what you discover.

4) As you begin to use the language of honoring, you may wonder what honoring is. This is a fine question to ask of yourself and others, including the people you work with as colleagues and as clients.

In the next few months this column will offer additional information about honoring and how you deepen your awareness of honoring as an Extension professional.

Principles and Practices of Honoring for Change Agents and Diversity Professionals

By Judith Aftergut, Executive Director, the Honoring Institute, Portland, Oregon