Released October 16, 2008
MANHATTAN, Kan. – Natural resistance to change makes choosing the time and place to introduce a new idea key to a successful discussion, said Charlotte Shoup Olsen, Kansas State University Research and Extension family systems specialist. Here’s an example:
One spouse would like to discuss scaling back holiday expenses. Should he or she introduce the subject:
1) Soon after the other spouse comes home from a difficult day at work?
2) During a television commercial?
3) On a leisurely weekend walk together?
Most people need time to catch their breath after work. Most also would prefer to get a snack, rather than make a decision during a commercial, Olsen said.
Choosing a quiet time with limited distractions to introduce a topic can facilitate discussion in a non-threatening setting without having to rush, she said.
Agreeing to re-visit the topic, not pushing for an immediate decision, also can be productive, Olsen said.
“Set a time to talk, though, to reach a mutually agreeable conclusion,” she added.
More information about successful communication in marriage and family relationships is available at county and district K-State Research and Extension offices and on the Kansas Extension Web site: http://www.oznet.ksu.edu. “CoupleTALK,” a set of communications lessons for couples to do on their own, is one of those resources.
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http://isis.oznet.ksu.edu/KSRENews/story/briefs101608.aspx
Contact: Elaine Edwards, elainee@ksu.edu
